Exhausted

I hate going home all the time. Oh, bold statement, me being honest, what a fucking shock. It is so fucking stupid sometimes. Having gone home every weekend for the past two months makes me realize why I stayed up in Hammond so much at the end of last semester and over Christmas break. I never have concrete plans up here, but I never fucking need them. We always make time for each other at school. I come home and it's a whole bunch of shit that I don't want to put up with. If you want to make plans with me, fucking make plans with me. If you don't, then fucking let me know so I stop trying to get in touch with you. It's not that hard. Everyone always sits around and complains about how no one includes them. Wah wah wah wah wah. Shut the fuck up. How do you think I feel when I'm an hour away and then people fucking get mad at me because I don't want to come home when I'm exhausted and have been in rehearsal constantly and still behind in school?

Don't get me wrong, I fucking love seeing people, but I fucking HATE feeling like I'm forcing people to see me. I just want me time. AND... when I don't come home everyone gets all whiney, "Why aren't you coming home" and "Oh, I miss you so much!" and "Awww I wish we could hang out, call me when you get in town." And then I DO call. And no one answers and everyone is already busy. And I'm just so tired of adjusting to everyone's fucking schedules all the fucking time. You either make time to see me or you don't. Don't leave me hanging. No is no. Yes is yes. If I can't see you, it's fine, but then don't tell me you want to fucking see me if you don't do anything about it.

I am aggravated. I am sore. I am so fucking tired. I have so much homework to do. And all I want to do is fucking write and cry.

I need better things in my life. This is just too fucking exhausting.

xoxo DannDann