Expect the unexpected

Things are very unexpected nowadays. I never thought I would be telling myself to "expect the unexpected" and have it mean something completely different than when I usually say it. That's what I have learned to do lately, to expect the unexpected. Everyone has their own life. Everyone has secrets. Everyone has something they want to keep to themselves. That's okay. It's weird though when I know something about a person and they don't know that I know it. I am that person though. I always want to confirm it with them. I need to stop doing that. Right now, there are so many things I want to talk about, but none of which I am supposed to know. It's silly. It's okay that I'm not supposed to know them, but I know them is what it boils down to. Hmm. I will just have to keep those to myself. That will be my secret...knowing everyone else's.

I loooove how I worded that. I seem to be moving way the fuck forward with people I hadn't expected to and way the fuck back with people I hadn't expected to either. I know I've fucked up recently with one person. I don't like that. While talking to that person last night, they made me realize that I really do question everything. I know I always overanalyze things and I know how everyone says that when I think, it's bad (because usually, it is). But I think too much about everything. Especially, lately. I think I have been given fair reason to doubt things but I think I've doubted things that should not have been doubted. At the same time, I think I have put too much trust in others (different people from the person I was previously talking about, just to clarify). It's difficult to tell where things will go from here.

I want to have a conversation tonight with one of my friends, but I know that if I do, it will be very very very hard for me to not be that person as I had previously stated that I am. I want to talk to them though, so we shall see how it goes. I don't know how this upcoming weekend is going to be. I'm coming home, but I think this weekend will be very different than last weekend. To tell you the truth, I think I should just stop guessing what will happen. Expect the unexpected. Fersure. But anyway, after this upcoming weekend, I think I will wait a while before I come in town again and if I come in town, I might just stay home. How lame. I'm well aware. Distance is a good thing.

I got a little bit upset with Olivia today. She was kind of being a bitch earlier and then I was like, "Well this is awkward, I'm gonna go." And that was that. It was weird. She apologized later, which I didn't expect (exactly! UNEXPECTED! What a shocker.) but I laughed. I can never be mad at her. I love it. I need to see her soon too! Oh my. I reorganized my pictures into a big "clusterfuck of memories" as Kaleb put it. Haha. Loveit. It looks good. I think I am going to reinstate someone's pictures today. I miss looking at them. They were very good memories. I want people to visit me one weekend. I think you all would love my dorm, my room, my everything. Oh! It is GRAND! I have a bathtub. Check that shit out. :]]

Well I have to research a topic for a speech I have to give on Thursday and I was supposed to be looking over it all weekend. My group meets in 12 minutes and I have yet to start looking. How silly. It will all work fine. Haha. You people need to call me, you silly silly people. Until next time, lovers...

xoxo DannDann