6 Feet From the Edge

I need a break. A real break. Not a ten minute break from the 20 pages of reading I've done in the past hour and a half. Not a home for the weekend break. A real break. I want to just go home and shut myself out from everything. And if you know the least bit about me, you know that I thrive off of other people and I would certainly die if I closed myself off like that. But that's what I want to do. I want to go home and see people for the two days that I usually see them and then I just want to be by myself. I just want to think. I want to figure out what the fuck I'm doing with my life, with myself.

I'm sitting here and not reading or studying or writing a paper, like I should be, I'm just thinking about how I never want to see the outside of my dorm again. I just want to stare at the pictures on my wall and have a notebook to write in and have that suffice as normal living. I don't want to go home for Christmas break. I want to move around. I want to be in a place where no one knows my name and where I don't give a fuck about anything but the sights around me. I wish I could live in a little room on the levi. I could go outside and see the water whenever I wanted and if someone needed me, they would know exactly where to find me. I want my world. I don't want the world, I want my world. I know I complain endlessly about people living in their own world and not the real world, but I wonder what it would be like. If I stopped calling, if I stopped caring, if I stopped thinking about anything but my happiness, or lack there of.

I want to stay in a place that I can call my own and not anyone else's. I don't want to study. I don't want to read about Caesar. I don't want to call. I don't want to worry. Period. I'm ready to give up. On pretty much everything.

Please come love
I think I'm falling
Holding on to all I think is safe
It seems I've found the road to no where
And I'm trying to escape
I yelled back when I heard thunder
But I'm down to one last breath
And with it let me say
Let me say...

Hold me now
I'm 6 feet from the edge
And I'm thinkin
Maybe 6 feet ain't so far down

I'm lookin down
Now that its over
Reflecting on all of my mistakes
I thought I found the road to somewhere
Somewhere in His grace
I cried out
Heaven save me
But I'm down to one last breath
And with it let me say
Let me say
Let me say..

Hold me now
I'm 6 feet from the edge
And I'm thinkin
Maybe 6 feet ain't so far down
I'm so far down

Sad eyes follow me
Well I still believe there's something there for me
So please come stay with me
Cause I still believe there's something left for you and me...
You and me...you and me

Hold me now
I'm 6 feet from the edge
And I'm thinkin
Hold me now
I'm 6 feet from the edge
And I'm thinkin
Maybe 6 feet ain't so far down...

Please come now
I think I'm falling
Holding on to all I think is safe...

xoxo DannDann